Monday, December 14, 2015

Creating Worlds Writing Camp - Challenge 4

Hey everyone!
I'm really surprised at how quickly I got this up. I'm not completely sold on this story, mostly the last part where things are explained, but you got to write badly to learn how not to write, right?;)
So, here's challenge 4!:D
Oh, wait. I need to show you the prompts I used!;D I always forget that!;)

I loved these prompts!;)
Okay, now for the actual story!:D
I had always wondered what my dad had been making in the factory he worked at. Was it something normal, like plastic bins or whatever they make in factories, or was there something more sinister being created?
“So, what do you make?” I asked my dad at the dinner table for the hundredth time.
“Indeed,” he replied, his go-to word for when he wasn't listening.
“No, seriously?” I pressed further and I leaned over the table a bit more. The curiosity had been killing me ever since I had heard a conversation over the phone with his boss.
I had been meaning to call my best friend, Hollyn, when I picked up the phone and overheard a conversation on the land line.
“No one can know what we're doing. Everything will be ruined-”
I had automatically clicked the phone off, my heart beating as I felt guilt squeezing my heart. But why should I feel guilt for overhearing something I never meant to overhear?
“Indeed,” he repeated. I knew that pressuring him further would make him leave, so I finished my food and raced to the home phone, since my dad never let me have my own phone, although I was almost fourteen. I dialed Hollyn's phone number and hurried into my room, shut the door, and sat on my bed, criss-cross apple sauce style.
The phone clicked on and Hollyn's voice came onto the receiver.
“Has he given any clues yet? Did you do it the way I told you, the whole pressuring and not letting him leave?” Hollyn asked. I yanked out the cream fuzz on my balding pillow, then sighed as I stared at it. This had become, as Hollyn called it, my angst pillow, where I let out all of my angst and frustration on it by pulling out the fuzz. I tossed it to the side and stared at my beige wall.
“Well, no, but Holly, I'm just not you. You could totally make him spill, but I'm just not good at interrogating him. See, it's hard, too, because I know he wasn't listening because he used the word 'indeed' like, five times,” I explained and realized my fingers had found the abused pillow again.
“I just need to know what's going on. And oh, Hollyn, I have a feeling it's not good,” I touched my forehead with my free hand. The speaker was silent for a couple minutes.
“And he won't ever spill, will he?” Hollyn replied.
“No,” I sighed and laid my head on a pillow.
“Essie, are you willing to do something pretty illegal to get to the bottom of this?” Hollyn asked and I clenched my teeth together, and brought my knees to my chest as I curled up on my side. I shut my eyes tightly and felt how the worry and curiosity were battling inside me, begging for an answer.
“We won't be hurting anybody will we?” I whispered into the phone, surprised at how I was actually considering doing something illegal.
“No! I wouldn't ever ask you to do something like that. I-I don't think we should talk about this over the phone for certain reasons. I'll meet you two blocks down from your house, okay? The usual meeting spot,” she said and I nodded, then realized she couldn't see me.
“Yeah. I'll get my shoes on and be there in a few minutes,” I stated and we said goodbye. I jumped off of my bed and threw my straight brown hair into a braid, slipped on my fingerless gloves, hoping they would give me that rebel feel, and pushed my feet into fuzzy black boots. I threw on a black jacket and a black hat and ran out the door, not even saying goodbye to my dad.
I walked swiftly to our meeting spot, my head down and feeling like I was already guilty of a horrendous crime. Hollyn was already there, her loose white t-shirt wiggling in the night air. I wondered how she looked so cool and rebel like without even trying. I sat down next to her on the steps of the abandoned house and, not daring to look at her, asked her about her ideas.
“You're probably going to chicken out, but I want to break into your dad's factory tonight,” she paused and my eyes bugged out at the thought. “I really love my town and I don't want it to be in danger. If your dad is doing something bad, I want-no, need- to know.”
I took a deep breath and nodded, staring down at the concrete steps.
“You don't have to go though. If you don't want to, I'll go by myself,” there wasn't any bitterness or hate in her voice as she said it and I knew she wouldn't be disappointed if I didn't go, but I couldn't let her do something so dangerous alone.
“I don't think we should,” I said, trying my first tactic of discouraging her.
“I'm going,” Hollyn stated and she stared at me, her ice blue eyes searching my face.
“You don't have to go, Essie. I'll go and find out by myself. I won't judge you or try to force you to do something you're not comfortable with. You can go home and not feel any guilt,” she declared, her voice serious. I met her eyes and shook my head. I looked at her, at her fire hydrant red hair and her dark brows, pulled in seriously and her sharp face, trying to gain strength from her own confidence.
“I go where you go.”
“H-how-how do w-we get in-n?” My voice catching on every other word. I was beyond nervous, but it was the incredible cold of the night that was making my voice hitch. I gawked at Hollyn's bare arms and wondered how she didn't feel the cold. I had given her my beanie to cover her hair which would draw attention to intruders and a couple wisps fell out from the hat, making her look incredibly cool. I couldn't help feeling a sting of jealousy.
“We are going to have to climb the gate,” Hollyn nodded to the soaring gate and I gulped.
“W-what if someone catches us? Will we be sent to jail?” I asked, afraid of her answer. She glanced at my with a bit of irritation glinting in her eye.
“I don't know. If you don't want to risk anything, you can still go home,” she stared my straight in my eyes. “But when we cross that gate, you can't get back.”
“I am coming!” I demanded and stepped up to the gate, trying to tell her I wasn't afraid, although I was trembling inside, and not only because of the cold. I buttoned the top button on my jacket as I stared at the red and white sign tied to the gate.
Private Property, No Trespassing.
Hollyn stationed her feet into the gate and began climbing. I followed her lead and climbed the gate slowly and carefully. She leaped from the top to the ground and landed on her feet and one hand. I sat on the top of the gate and tried to mimic her exactly. I pushed one of my hands out and I hit the ground.
“Ow!” I yelped as I stared at my hand, sharp rocks cut into my palm and I wondered how Hollyn did it. She began running to the factory silently and swiftly and I followed her. She pressed herself to the factory's wall and glanced around the corner, exactly like a movie.
“Is it clear?” I asked quietly. She nodded and flew to a crate and crouched down, barely peeking above it. I ducked behind the crate but didn't see anyone.
“Let's go!” I whispered sharply and led the way to the factory door. She swaggered towards it, her sharp face twisted into a scowl at me that I could tell she was trying to suppress.
“What?” I questioned but the just shook her head and waved her hand, dismissing the subject. She scrutinized the lock and frowned.
“You have a bobby pin?” she questioned and I shook my head. Hollyn sighed and dug through her pockets, then gasped, a smile lighting her face. She unearthed the item from her pocket and smirked. A multi-tool pocket knife lay in her hand. Hollyn pushed out a screwdriver-like tool and stuck it up the lock. She wiggled it around and twisted it, her tongue sticking out. The lock clicked and she tossed it away while smiling a proud smile. I grinned and I glanced at the unlocked door. Just one push and the secrets of the factory would be poured out unto them. I braced myself for the horror of what lay behind the door. Hollyn pressed her fingers onto the door and pushed.
The void of black was terrifying and I couldn't bring myself to follow Hollyn inside. She disappeared inside the dark and then I heard her scream. I leaped into action and into the dark factory to feel someone grab my arm and clutch a hand over my mouth. I struggled in the vise-like grip of the person, then the lights turned on.
“Dad?” I asked, but my voice was muffled as I saw my dad in the midst of a dozen other people.
“Let her go,” he said to the person holding me and he quickly let go.
“What are you doing here?” my dad asked and I stared at him.
“What's going on here?” I questioned, looking at the people around. “Where is all of whatever you are making?”
“I can't believe you followed me and broke in! You could have been arrested!” he shouted.
“What is this?” I continued to ask.
“You need to go home. Forget all this,” he ordered, but one of the other people around stood up.
“No. Wait,” the man cut in. “You haven't thought of the pros to letting them know.”
My dad turned around to face the man and he frowned. “What would those be?”
“Children are innocent. The government would not suspect them!” the man cried and a couple other people nodded.
“What is going on?” Hollyn shouted.
“Yeah, Dad, explain,” I urged. The man nodded and my dad twisted to face me.
“I see Matthew's point, but I don't like the idea of sending you into danger.”
“I swear, if you don't explain what this is, I'm going to-” Hollyn's threat was stopped as my dad cut in.
“I will explain. You two are only kids, you don't know about the terrible leadership that this town has.”
“I've heard enough,” Hollyn said, her arms crossed. My dad nodded.
“They have become worse and worse with their leadership and the time has come for the citizens to act. We need to stop them from doing something drastic, something that will destroy our city.”
“What's that?” I asked, my nerves beginning to build up from how serious my dad was speaking.
“They are wanting to start a war.”
“No way. Cities can't start wars, can they? We are too small in number, anybody could destroy us!” Hollyn exclaimed, snorting.
“Their pride will be the ruining of us all. Matthew is suggesting that you must be the one to infiltrate the government and help us stop them.”
“You're kidding right?” I asked, laughing nervously when he shook his head. “We're just kids. We aren't supposed to be heroes.”
“But you could be,” my dad replied. “We need to work out a plan but this could work,” my dad looked at the fellow conspiracy members.
“There is no way-”
“I'm in,” Hollyn cut in after a long silence from her. I gaped at her.
“What? Why?” I cried. She stared at me with her simple stare.
“This is life changing, Essie. I am not going to miss out on this. I love my town. I want to protect it. You don't have to do it, too, but I'm going to help. If not us, who will?” She asked. I felt a shiver run up my spine to my toes as I stepped closer to her and grabbed her hand. Shifting my gaze from my dad to my best friend, I took a deep breath.
“I go where you go.”
I hope you liked it, even if parts of it were poorly written.;) I was meaning to post pictures I've drawn of some guys today, but I guess that'll be for tomorrow!;D


  1. That was super fast after the prompts were posted! :D This story was suspenseful. :)

    ~Ms. AGdoll~

  2. Wow... I felt like I was really there when I was reading this! I could see the characters in my head and everything! It wasn't poorly written at all, I loved it! :D

    1. Oh wow! Thank you so much! I've never heard that before!:D

  3. Wow, this was AMAZING.

  4. I loved it! Hollyn seems like an awesome friend.

    1. Thanks! I really liked writing her, she reminded me of an old friend I had!:)

  5. This was pretty awesome for 'poorly written'. Don't look down on your writing, it's great.

    1. Thank you, Josie! I liked the story, just thought the end was somewhat cliché.;) But, I agree with you.:)